Just don't know what to do
I'm speechless most of the time
The world's lost its bearing
Humanity is a crime
I look inwards to introspect
My fences are all down
I've lost what it means to be me
I see a contorted clown
Sometimes I see my face reflected
On the glass with a happening screen
My stupor is quite a contrast
I'm a shadow of what I'd been
The past cuts like a knife
Can't not remember it
Everything is fresh
And vividly lit
Yesterdays that were good
Are so painful now
What was pain then
Blotted out somehow
I've lost my bearing too
I'm often a confused mess
A miserablist sitting in a dark room
Gloomier and still darker - my stress
My soul is dead, a spectre of the past
I'm not sure how uphill normal is
My weaknesses are very clear
Don't think I'll survive this
It isn't easily cured
I feel it spreading like cancer
A black sticky slime growing
Tears the temporary answer
I know it'll make it worse
Make the self-hatred come alive
I'll feel the gnawing claw
Tear me in bleeding five
It'll circle back to wishing death
Or wishing I was never born
If I could silence the sorrow
Lessen the turmoil and scorn
That's it I can't stand it anymore
What can I do to die
I don't want to live any longer
I don't want to lie
