I am Mr. Superstition
I take you, the modern man for a ride
I rub my sperm on your neck
Makes it easy to glide
Groups are easier to fool
I've fooled armies and ants
My holiness is so hot
That I don't wear any pants
I only talk in Barnum
You think I'm a mystical seer
I carry silly anachronistic toys
I subjugate you with fear
A few stage magic tricks
Well rehearsed sleight of hand
Informers and background research
Places your trust on a stand
You sit on layers of everyday angst
All very common so to speak
But you think you're special
Helps me make an income quick
Your cognitive biases memorized
I cold read your limited brain
Supernatural and pseudoscience
Help me scam your pain
It's less depressing to be a deluded nitwit
It's scary if you're not
The world doesn't give a shit
Humans are just like snot
The equations that define things
Are a lot of work to learn
The fiction of the faith gives
Easy shortcuts that earn
The world is riding a new age wave
Rationality is a festering sore
If you wait for evidence and reason
I deem you less than a whore
Plus I know you're slow wit
I know you slept through school
It's so easy to fuck with you
You're already an Ignoramus fool
To save your status
I'll throw in a bit of quantum physics
I'll make your shit sound important
Seduce with cajoling sticks
Palmistry, astrology, homeopathy
I'm on top of it all
My beard is useful in all religions
Dress and makeup after the call
I bend spoons and move mountains
I always talk to ghosts
In fact I've published my rates
On blockchain and blog posts
Voodoo, tarot card, haunting
Healing and astral peeks
Everything is doable
Money always speaks
It helps that you are foggy
Makes for an excellent prey
I make it sound you're clever in the head
Although it's made of hay
My prevarications too subtle for hay
I use circular logic all the time
Doublespeak is my expertise
I have several degrees in crime
Your flexibility is just a carry over
A childhood of innocent indoctrination
Generation of bullshit handed down
And now prevalent fashion
I'll ride you into all kinds of shit
Guaranteed bullshit runs you dry
If you don't get results now
Many lifetimes you get to try
