I get in the pool, to get cool,
Lately the heat is getting really hot.
And when I swim, hit by whim,
I poop when I like a particular spot.
It may be a hairy guy, I'm very very shy,
My asshole quivering with lust.
Or at times, an untimely fart,
Pushes a few turds with the thrust.
I'm very smart, hastily depart,
People think it's someone else.
The bubbles in the gas, foul stench it has,
Break on the surface with the smell.
Sometimes the turds float, a brownish coat,
Of slippery slime that glisten in the sun.
People get very sick, the water very thick,
Defecation can be just so much fun.
Now I don't know, that pool I cannot go,
The water is a rank smelling goop,
You can't move a bit, full of puke and spit,
The unkindness shown to my poop.
Today the sun is hot, I'm pissed in my cot,
The heat is just overbearing.
I'll ignore the scum, my pool here I come,
A little diarrhea will sundry smiles bring.
Doom scrolling nerds, will order my turds,
The greatest psychedelic there is.
On bulk purchase, per ten kilo case,
I'll add a gallon of warm foamy piss.
How I want to shit, in massive amounts that is,
To fill the whole fucking sea.
Next nobel prize, you wouldn't be surprised,
Surely must come to me.
Darkness in my soul has colored my shit like coal,
But I'm really very fond of my shit.
The smoke in my poot, smells just like soot,
Twilight is so mysteriously unlit.
Climate change is here, my shit everywhere,
How cool is that to boot.
Mother nature as bitch, indecorous climate witch,
Getting badly burned by their poot.
Dear fucking god, I'm a cheerless sod,
Don't let this heat fuck my ass.
Constipated as hell, I'll ring your heaven's bell,
I'm so full of shit and gas.
